I have had a few conversations with fellow males on this subject. What is more important to you in others, looks or personality? What strikes me, is that nearly all guys say that they value a good personality more than looks, but that they are more specific when they describe the looks they wish to see in a woman.
For example, when I ask a guy, who claims to value personality, what kind of characteristics he searches for, he usually replies “ehrm… she has to be nice, erhm… sweet and erhm… smart of course”. The thing is, I can’t imagine any guy who doesn’t want a woman to have these traits. However, when I get to the questions about desired physical appearances, I tend to get clear and thought through answers like “Oh I love blonde girls. She definitely has to have a tight butt, but I don’t care about the front. No fatties or redheads, those won’t do.” This is only one example of the many different answers. That makes me wonder how much guys (including me) actually value the woman’s mind. Do the specific qualifications that we set for the exterior make us shallow beings? When I say ‘us’, I don’t mean all men, because that would be generalising. I simply mean most of the guys I have had this conversation with.
I will admit to being a shallow person. I have denied certain women because of their looks before, and I’m sure I will do that again in the future. Furthermore, I can think of at least two girls in my school who I would do anything for (even if they decided to treat me like trash), just because they appear so beautiful (to me). Does this make me a bad person? Or just a typical adolescent?
That I’m shallow, does not mean that there aren’t any personal qualities that I favour in women. I love it when women can speak their mind, but not to go as far as saying every useless thing that they think off. Also, I appreciate it when a girl has a better sense of style than me, not that I set the bar really high there. But the point that I’m trying to make is that I would date a girl with the right looks, over a girl with the right personality. How wrong is that?
I don't think it's necessarily wrong, but then again how long would you last with a girl with a mediocre personality as opposed to someone with whom you really connect?
BeantwoordenVerwijderenWhich is why a lot of men have a hard time finding the 'right' woman for them.
BeantwoordenVerwijderenAnd when I figured I found the 'right woman', it turns out she doesn't feel the same way. D'aww.
BeantwoordenVerwijderen'Does that make me a bad person?'
BeantwoordenVerwijderenNo.
'Or just a typical adolescent?'
No.
It just confirms that you are just like every other creature with eyes.
It's nature, it's how things work.